On Saturday September 29th, 2012 I had the wonderful opportunity to go to the Relief Society General meeting with my mom. This is a fun time for my mom and I to do something together, we usually go to her stake house to have dinner and dessert before the meeting. This year there were so many soups to choose from, I ended up having potato cheese soup and my mom had a chicken noodle soup, it was delicious. It was fun to see some old friends and to hear our leaders speak to us as directed by the Lord.
In preference to my next comments, I went into to this conference having a feeling of hopelessness, anger, and sadness, due to a recent miscarry. This miscarry was harder in a way than the other two that I had prior to Carson. With this miscarriage, I am somewhat ashamed to say I was angry. Why did I have to go through another one after knowing I could carry a child and deliver a healthy happy baby? What had I not learned from the other miscarries that I still needed to know? So prior to attending this conference I had prayed to have a sense of why and a feeling of being able to be okay and to move on with a positive look on life, knowing everything has its time and purpose The Lord answered my prayer in a with a very simple phrase,
"He has not forgotten you." I then realized that my Savior knew exactly the pain I was feeling because he had suffered in Gethsemane, and he had felt the same exact pain and feelings I had with this loss. He and only he knew, and he was telling me personally that he "Has not forgotten me!"
My emotions are still as raw as they were that night as I write this post, but I wanted all who read this to know that he "Has not Forgotten you."
No matter what you are going through how difficult your situation is he understands. He will help you through your personal journey on earth, if you will follow him and allow him to do so. Though I left the conference not knowing why I had to go through the trial again or if I will in the future, I did, however, leave the conference having a sense of peace and happiness that I did not have when I entered the chapel that night. Even though I may have sadness from time to time because of this loss, I am now at peace with the situation and will continue to grow my family and one day Carson will have brothers and sisters, this I know. I have a testimony that our Savior felt our pain and sufferings in the Garden when he atoned for our sins, and that through him we can have that peace when come to difficult situations in our lives.